No Resolutions!

It's another year and unlike a lot of people, I'm not making any resolutions for the future. Instead I'm focused day by day, moment by moment.

This time last year, I was feeling really depressed and it had begun to weigh me down physically and mentally. I didn't recognize who I was anymore and I didn't like my life or what I saw in the mirror. I remember being in tears and feeling "enough is enough"and it was in that moment that I resolved to live the life that I wanted regardless of my current circumstances.

I stopped waiting for the perfect time to start a diet or exercise, I stopped trying to avoid activities that I wanted to do because I wasn't skinny enough, I stopped putting myself down, stopped eating if I really wasn't hungry or if the food didn't taste as good as the first few bites, stopped allowing people in my life to hurt me and STOPPED trying to be perfect.

I started to pamper myself, tried new things, began doing the physical activities that made me feel good - like dancing, started putting on makeup for no other reason but to look cute for myself (even if I didn't leave the house that day), I started to savor and cook new healthy foods, and most importantly - I started to BELIEVE that it really is possible to live the life of my dreams if I BEGIN with the present moment and leave the past where it belongs!

I know it might seem like a silly concept BUT amazingly - this past year I've lost 51pounds without killing myself in a gym, improved my self-esteem, invested more in my family and friends, accomplished professional and personal achievements and have found a new joy in life.

It's exciting to SEE moment by moment my transformation into the person I've always wanted to be!

Role of a Lifetime!

I wonder if we had to audition for life - if I would I be cast as the principal character of my own life's story?

Sometimes when I lose motivation, doubt my talents, or compare myself to other leading ladies - I KNOW I wouldn't make the cut. Caught up by obstacles, too often I can forget that this life has a role that I was born to play!

Luckily for me, I didn't have to audition for the part - because the director believed enough in my talents, regardless of my shortcomings to give me the lead.

I have to learn to accept this exciting opportunity of life. To delve deeper into my character and experience more than just acting by sharing with my audience the beauty of my humanity and soul, how I discover and explore ways to transcend mediocrity by learning the beauty crystallizing a string of moments together and transforming them into the role of a lifetime!

Going Involuntarily Green for 30 days

In a story too convoluted to post - I have spent the past month going involuntarily green. I got reacquainted with public transportation and learned surprisingly - it isn't that bad. Once you get the schedule down and accept that any destination will add an extra 1/2 hour to hour of commute time, it's pretty easy to get to and fro and the amount of "undesireables is pretty low. I quite enjoyed having a latte, reading a book and arriving at work stress less from not having to deal with road rage.

Unsurprisingly, some of my destinations where a pain in the caboose to get to, but hearken my trusty bike and I was quickly able to get where I needed to go in a jiff!

Having already chosen a geographic location to live that has MOST of my needs in close vicinity, I was able to reduce my carbon foot print and lose 10 lbs in a month!

Will I completely give up my right to drive? NO, but what I have learned in the past month WILL continue to be a part of my new routine - Hail to my new trusty stead!

The Nose

To me it had always been so much more than a nose. The nose only represented something larger. The nose was a bridge between two points. One representing the past and the other representing the future. The nose was a symbol. The symbol of discontent and the eternal quest for harmony. In it - I saw myself.

To the nose, it had probably seen itself as a metaphor for the change it had been through. It had started off with the fullest of potential but slowly had whittled itself to nothing - a hollow reminder of it's former glory.

The nose was always trying not to be defined by its past. Always attempting to get over the pain of past hurts to find balance, but forever falling short of its natural beauty.

I will always wonder - if the nose had ever learned to accept himself, to acknowledge the pain, to move past it and to forgive? That eventually, it had been able to see itself in the mirror and just love itself for being, no longer caring what others thought, being comfortable in its own skin.

In the end, I'd like to believe that the nose did!

Got "Good Dick"?

Every now and then, skimming through the rentals - you come across a hidden gem of an indie film. "Good Dick" is a film written, directed, produced and even starred in by Marianna Palka whose artistic talent explores the connection of a new relationship. Jason Ritter plays to perfection, a video store clerk who initiates a relationship with the weirdly isolated customer played by Palka by - offering up suggestions on the porn that she rents.

What ensues, is the fine dance of two dis-similar people coming together to provide companionship, love and dysfunction.

Happiness For Happiness Sake!

It seemed like every one's point of view today was to stop taking their life for granted. It's as if the Collective Conscious woke up today and said "stop bitching...your life is OK!" Even the Grocer had some insight to speak of rather than the usual casual banter of the checkout line. Today was different and he was relishing his newfound happiness for his life.

It was exactly what I needed to hear, too often it is easy to bemoan the trials of life and forget that these trials or tests are to prepare, enrich and when looked upon closely - realize it could be a lot worse!

The Last.FM Radio Station You'll Ever Need!

I've checked out a few of the Internet radio sites. So far, Last.FM is my favorite. Containing a fairly extensive database of music with the capability to expand music tastes by recommendation of similar artists based upon the contents of your itunes library. Scrolling through the music, track name or listed artist - check out the artist's bio, photo or videos and...Don't forget the tour dates to have the opportunity to see a favorite or newly discovered artist live!

Unlike Pandora, Last.FM's ability to make different radio stations based on multiple artists, favorite artist, genre, or a particular track offers greater selection. An instant favorite for me is "Stand-up Radio" with artists like Bill Burr, Joe Rogan, Nick Swardson, Ralphie May and Jim Gaffigan the spot on humor has helped long office work hours fly by.

Just a reminder - to those of you in cubicle world KEEP the headsets plugged in and the laughter kept to a minimum, even though inside you will feel the need to roll back and forth on ground giddy from laughter because it's really that good!